8 Clear Signs Someone Is Using You in a Relationship

Love should make you feel secure, appreciated, and valued. But sometimes, people enter relationships for selfish reasons—emotional comfort, attention, or even financial support. If your connection feels one-sided, you might be getting used instead of being loved. Here are eight warning signs to watch for.

1. They Only Reach Out When They Need Something

A genuine partner stays in touch because they care about you, not only when they need a favor, money, or emotional support. If you notice that most of your conversations start with requests, it’s a red flag.

2. Your Efforts Go Unnoticed

Healthy relationships are about mutual effort. When you keep giving, compromising, or sacrificing, but your partner rarely acknowledges it, it signals imbalance.

3. They Avoid Deep Emotional Connection

If your partner changes the topic whenever you talk about feelings or future plans, it may show they’re not emotionally invested. They want the benefits of a relationship without real vulnerability.

4. You Feel Drained Instead of Happy

Feeling constantly exhausted, anxious, or unappreciated after being with your partner often means emotional manipulation. Love should uplift you, not weigh you down.

5. They Disappear During Your Hard Times

Real love shows up during struggles. If your partner withdraws when you face problems or only comes back when things are fine again, they may be emotionally unavailable or self-centered.

6. They Make You Feel Guilty for Setting Boundaries

If simple requests like “I need some space” or “Please respect my time” trigger guilt trips or anger, you might be dealing with someone who thrives on control.

7. They Never Invest in Your Growth

Someone who truly loves you supports your goals, encourages your dreams, and celebrates your wins. If your partner seems jealous or uninterested in your progress, their intentions might not be genuine.

8. You Sense the Relationship is One-Sided

When you’re the one constantly reaching out, planning dates, or fixing conflicts, it’s time for honest reflection. A relationship should feel balanced, not transactional.

Final Thoughts

Being used in a relationship can quietly damage your self-worth. Recognizing these signs early helps protect your emotional health and make space for genuine love. Remember, the right person won’t make you question your value—they’ll remind you of it.